I Like a Moose

When I was a young man I used to like girls; I'd tickle their bodies and play with their curls. But my girlfriend ran off with a sailor named Bruce Now, you'd never be treated that way by a moose!

Chorus: And it's moose, moose, I like a moose, I've never had anything quite like a moose. I've had many women, my life has been loose But I've never had anything quite like a moose.

Whenever I feels I'm in need of a lay I goes to my cupboard and gets me some hay. I leans out my window and spreads it around 'Cos a moose always comes when there's hay on the ground!

[Chorus]

I've done it with all sorts of beasties with hair I'd do it with snakes if their fangs wasn't there! I've had me a chicken, a duck and a goose But I've never had anything wuite like a moose.

[Chorus]

Purple gorillas on Saturday night, Lions and tigers, they puts up a fight! But it just ain't the same when you slams their caboose As the feeling you get when you're humping a moose.

[Chorus]

Now I am old … and increasing in years I looks on my past, and I sheds me no tears. I just sits in my chair with a glass of Mateus, Playing Hide the Salami with Minnie the Moose!

Final Chorus: And it's moose, moose, I like a moose, I've never had anything quite like a moose. I've had men and women, my life has been loose But I've never had anything quite like a moose.